Funny email I received.
Friday, October 14
Thursday, October 13
The Hell Continues
19 minutes of hell didn't go so well today. I feel stiff as a board. After Monday's hell session and Tuesday's Tae bo session my body wasn't really agreeable. Practically everything I told my body to do it wouldn't follow my instructions. I think I made to minute 11 of 19 before my body really started giving me fits. At that point, in total frustration and embarassment, I began an on going conversation with Mari, the video instructor. I can't tell you how many times asked her if she was crazy for wanting me to do this movement or that movement. I mean, this woman told us to lie stretched out on our backs with arms by your side and legs stretched. Then she said flip your legs over head parellel to the floor with your weight supported on your shoulders. Then stretch your legs toward the ceiling in a pike posistion and hold it there. Slow and controlled...supported by your powerhouse (I assume she means my abdomen) ease your body back down to the ground with your legs still pointed towards the ceiling. Woman, are you crazy? I can't do that once let it alone 4 times in a row. I grunted and moaned while attempting to perform aforementioned movement. Without much success I finally gave up during attempt number 3 and said sorry Mari I can't do that today I won't even begin to describe the other 2 movements I bailed out on. All I know is Mari kept telling me to use my powerhouse and my buttocks to hold some crazy contortion when your arms and legs are pointed upward in a V position while your weight is supported by your butt or the tailbone region. Yea. Uh huhn. Not gonna happen. I copped an attitude and regressed to my youth as I whispered under my breath I don't see you doing these moves Mari. There you are just standing behind everybody. Telling everyone else what to do. Oo, I can't stand you. You make me sick.
Happily for me, it is only 19 minutes of hell. I don't think I could stand anything longer.
By the way, I'll be happy when this soreness goes away. Right now I have the walk of a cowboy with jock itch. It ain't pretty.
See ya Friday Mari!
Happily for me, it is only 19 minutes of hell. I don't think I could stand anything longer.
By the way, I'll be happy when this soreness goes away. Right now I have the walk of a cowboy with jock itch. It ain't pretty.
See ya Friday Mari!
Tuesday, October 11
19 minutes of hell
About 3 1/2 weeks ago I started experiencing excruciating back pain. Everyday it seemed like the pain increased ten fold and my back made my entire body feel tense. It was hard to breath and painful to turn my head to the left. Nonetheless, I reasoned the pain would eventually go away if I stopped sleeping so wildly. After 2 nights of peaceful slumber with ever increasing back pain that theory was shot to hell. I next reasoned that I needed to stretch my back muscles so I performed every stretch I could think of. I immediately felt worse but persevered through 2 more stretching sessions before I said screw this. I finally made a same-day emergency chiropractic appointment. My chiro doc made all kinds oos and ahs as he felt up and down my spine as if to say you should be in pain fool with these many verterbra out of line. Snap! Crackle! Pop! I felt like a new man. The trouble area that was tight finally had loosened. However, my chiro doc warned that he was going to have to perform a few atypical violent adjustments and I'd probably feel some pain. He wasn't kidding. One area in my neck is still tender and my chiro adjustment was last Tuesday. (Usually, if there's any lingering pain after leaving the chiro's office it last no more than a day. This new pain only occurs when I tilt my head backward but I don't mind it much. I am too thankful I'm able to turn my head to the left...again.)
On Saturday my back started tigtening up much to my chagrin. I could tell my vertebrae were out of alignment again because of certain tingling pain I felt every time I stood from a seated position. I finally knew what needed to be done. And I wasn't looking forward to the task. It was time to get serious about exercising with an emphasis on strenghtening my abdominal and back muscles. I hadn't been to the gym in 3 months and in that time my membership had expired so I blew up my body ball and went to town Sunday and Monday.
I knew that wasn't going to be enough. I knew I needed something more structured than lying on my body ball for a few sets of this or that exercise. That's when I got the bright idea to dive head first into pilates. Soooo...this morning I turned on my new Windsor PilatesAdvanced Slimming video and endured 19 minutes of hell. I was happy that I made it to minute 14 before she hit me with some crazy movement that my body wouldn't let me perform no matter how hard I tried. Truth be told, I didn't try too hard. That body position didn't look normal. The good news is that I finished the video unscathed. For a pilates newbie I was quite satisfied with my results. I hope my 3 a week dosage of 19 minutes of hell will be worth it all in the long run.
On Saturday my back started tigtening up much to my chagrin. I could tell my vertebrae were out of alignment again because of certain tingling pain I felt every time I stood from a seated position. I finally knew what needed to be done. And I wasn't looking forward to the task. It was time to get serious about exercising with an emphasis on strenghtening my abdominal and back muscles. I hadn't been to the gym in 3 months and in that time my membership had expired so I blew up my body ball and went to town Sunday and Monday.
I knew that wasn't going to be enough. I knew I needed something more structured than lying on my body ball for a few sets of this or that exercise. That's when I got the bright idea to dive head first into pilates. Soooo...this morning I turned on my new Windsor PilatesAdvanced Slimming video and endured 19 minutes of hell. I was happy that I made it to minute 14 before she hit me with some crazy movement that my body wouldn't let me perform no matter how hard I tried. Truth be told, I didn't try too hard. That body position didn't look normal. The good news is that I finished the video unscathed. For a pilates newbie I was quite satisfied with my results. I hope my 3 a week dosage of 19 minutes of hell will be worth it all in the long run.
Friday, October 7
Quoted as Saying
TRAVOLTA AND PRESTON SUGGEST A 'SILENT BIRTH' TO KATIE
Scientology couple JOHN TRAVOLTA and KELLY PRESTON are urging KATIE HOLMES to have a 'silent birth' when she delivers fiance TOM CRUISE's baby next year (06) and follow the church's strict doctrines.
Scientologists believe children should be brought into the world without any fuss and be allowed to quietly get used to their surroundings. That means no music, no chatting and no expressions of pain from the mother.
Preston explains, "It's just because everything in moments of pain is really recorded and you want to have that (the birth) peaceful and clear of sort of suggestions or different words that can then affect them (babies) in their future." --- ERRRR!!!!!(Scooby Doo style)
DANZA SLAMS CRUISE
Former TAXI star TONY DANZA is far from impressed with TOM CRUISE and KATIE HOLMES' baby news - because they're having a child out of wedlock.
The talk show host says, "I'm a little upset about this. Here's a guy out there lecturing people about drugs, but out of wedlock births don't seem to bother him.
"He's never (appearing on) my show, so it doesn't matter."
He adds, "I'm happy for them, but we're going to send them to MAURY (POVICH's show) for a DNA test. - Is Tony implying something?
Scientology couple JOHN TRAVOLTA and KELLY PRESTON are urging KATIE HOLMES to have a 'silent birth' when she delivers fiance TOM CRUISE's baby next year (06) and follow the church's strict doctrines.
Scientologists believe children should be brought into the world without any fuss and be allowed to quietly get used to their surroundings. That means no music, no chatting and no expressions of pain from the mother.
Preston explains, "It's just because everything in moments of pain is really recorded and you want to have that (the birth) peaceful and clear of sort of suggestions or different words that can then affect them (babies) in their future." --- ERRRR!!!!!(Scooby Doo style)
DANZA SLAMS CRUISE
Former TAXI star TONY DANZA is far from impressed with TOM CRUISE and KATIE HOLMES' baby news - because they're having a child out of wedlock.
The talk show host says, "I'm a little upset about this. Here's a guy out there lecturing people about drugs, but out of wedlock births don't seem to bother him.
"He's never (appearing on) my show, so it doesn't matter."
He adds, "I'm happy for them, but we're going to send them to MAURY (POVICH's show) for a DNA test. - Is Tony implying something?
Thursday, October 6
Yummy in my Tummy
If you're a fan of waffle cones then you have to do yourself a favor pick a box of Trader Joe's Belgian Butter Waffle Cookies. I can't eat just one. I normally kill the box of 30 cookies in one day...in a 2 hour span. If I'm patient enough and really feeling like a glutton I eat the cookies and Soy Delicious Creamy Vanilla Ice Cream.
Trader Joe's Swedish Pancake and Waffle Mix is a must try. You add water to the mix, stir then pour in the pan/on the griddle then you're set to make these tasty thin pancakes. I added cinnamon and vanilla to the mix to jazz it up a bit. The cashier at Trader Joe's suggested I wrap the pancakes around strawberries like she and her daughter often do. I opted for topping with the pancakes with natural applesauce and a few teaspoons of maple syrup and it was really good.
I am the laziest persons around. Thus, I like buying short cut meal items...a lot. On one recent excursion to Ralph's Grocery Store I found Oh Boy!'s Stuffed Potatoes (which are mashed potatoes in little plastic tubs) in the frozen section. I was curious to give 'em a try because I am a potato maic. To my delight after 3 or 4 minutes in the microwave my taste buds were treated to some good eating. MMM!!!!
Nature's Path Instant Hot Oatmeal is a lifesaver. (Quick, easy and microwaveable) Add milk or water and you're good to go. I add Almond Breeze Almond Milk Vanilla Flavored to my Maple Nut seasoned oatmeal and I am happy as can be.
Trader Joe's Swedish Pancake and Waffle Mix is a must try. You add water to the mix, stir then pour in the pan/on the griddle then you're set to make these tasty thin pancakes. I added cinnamon and vanilla to the mix to jazz it up a bit. The cashier at Trader Joe's suggested I wrap the pancakes around strawberries like she and her daughter often do. I opted for topping with the pancakes with natural applesauce and a few teaspoons of maple syrup and it was really good.
I am the laziest persons around. Thus, I like buying short cut meal items...a lot. On one recent excursion to Ralph's Grocery Store I found Oh Boy!'s Stuffed Potatoes (which are mashed potatoes in little plastic tubs) in the frozen section. I was curious to give 'em a try because I am a potato maic. To my delight after 3 or 4 minutes in the microwave my taste buds were treated to some good eating. MMM!!!!
Nature's Path Instant Hot Oatmeal is a lifesaver. (Quick, easy and microwaveable) Add milk or water and you're good to go. I add Almond Breeze Almond Milk Vanilla Flavored to my Maple Nut seasoned oatmeal and I am happy as can be.
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