I had one of the best laughs of my life on the phone with my buddy OJ last night. He was filling me in on the drama that's been going on between his mama and daddy. There's trouble in paradise.
Apparently, mama OJ found viagra in daddy OJ's belongings along with some 'stay hard' cream. She confronted daddy OJ about his goods and accused him of cheating because she and daddy OJ haven't had sex in years. Mind you, OJ's parents are in their 60s. He denied any wrongdoing so she asked him for an explanation for having the viagra pills. He in turn, flipped out and lectured her on his moral fortitude. He tells mama OJ that he's a god fearing, christian man that would never cheat. He tells her the only reason he has the pills is because he's selling them. *snicker break. LOL! that line right there cracks me up everytime I think about it. selling viagra? Ha!!!! who is he fooling? no-damn-body. he's a retired postman. Ha!*
Mama OJ is livid. She is beyond convinced that daddy OJ is cheating. After finding the sex aids, listening in on one of his hush-hush phone conversations in which she overheard him saying "I can't wait that long. You know I can't wait. Why you making me wait for it?," watching him leave the house M-F at 3am to go the gym that doesn't open until 6am and is only 10 minutes from their house and witnessing some other unusual behavior last year on their annual vacation she knows something's going on. She just doesn't have concrete proof.
OK. So, you'll never guess what she's decided to do to retaliate. Mama OJ went to the local Adult Bookstore and bought herself a silk panty and bra set. She also purchased some "special rubbing cream" as she calls it. She told OJ she plans to head back to the ABS to buy a vibrator. Then she's gonna put her wares on display on the dresser for daddy OJ to see to let him know two can play that game. ROFLMAO!
OJ has advised his mom not to carry out her plan. He doesn't think she'll live out the night if daddy OJ sees all that stuff. Hahaha!!!!
Did I already mention they're in their mid 60s? LOL! Oh this is bananas.
8 comments:
Okay TMI...the imagery is disturbing to say the least. But um yeah, homie is getting his groove on. Anytime a mofo explodes like that...he's got something to hide. I'm just saying.
60's or not, that ole' guy is a player and I'd kick his retired postal ass to the curb.
berry - oh berry don't be so squeamish. older women want to get their groove on too. :-D
kathi - ever heard the expression 'its cheaper to keep her?' kicking him to the curb may not be the best financial move for either party, sadly.
I am DISTURBED that Mama OJ would share all this with her child! What happened to anything sexual being off limits between kids and their parents?!
Shawn for real....your friends are off tha hook. Got any normal ones? LOL
Mwabi - you mean, your friends don't have good stories like mine do?
no I mean your ass has some crazy friends!! LOL.
Are you saying I'm boring?? *gasp*
Dang, check the drama at the rest home. I agree with "cheaper to keep her/him" ... especially with no hard evidence.
LOL!!! That is sooo funny! You have to find out if she did it or not...
By the way, I like your new layout.
Post a Comment