Remember friend & hubby and the gift? Well you'll never guess. It looks like they're on the outs. Ok, friend called me this weekend for our usual random, mindless, meaningless chit chat that only friends can enjoy with one another. Somehow we started discussing christmas presents and what she had purchased for her daughter, her parents and her nieces and nephews. When I asked her what she planned on buying hubby she said nothing. I made jokes about her pettiness and wondered why she was behaving so maliciously. She then told me that she had informed hubby that she wanted a divorce. I in turn fell out laughing because friend & hubby are like Whitney & Bobby, it's a "Strange Relationship" but it works for them. Why? I asked. She said I am tired of his shit. Of course, I've heard this statement a millions during the course of their on-again off-again relationship so this didn't faze me one bit. In fact, it only made me laugh harder. We continued to laugh and joke about this supposed breakup when she says you not gone believe this one. I reply Oh lord, what did you do now? You love drama. She giggles then proceeds to say You know what I told him, Shawn? I said hubby, you know what's the best present you can get me for Christmas? Get the fuck up out my house! I lost it. I was almost in tears. I told her she was certifiably nuts. Friend and hubby are from the DC/Merlin area (yes Merlin and not Maryland; if you're from the area you know what's up). Merlin-ites have a dialect that can make the most ghetto of statements even more ghetto and comical once they jazz it up their with their local dialect. Friend made sure to put a little extra Merlin accent on that statement and its effect was successful in enducing uncontrollable laughter for a good 5 minutes. I still can't think about our conversation without giggling.
Just to show you how crazy she is, let me share this with you. She tells me that if hubby doesn't leave peaceably by the end of the month, she's going to have the locks changed and has already contacted a locksmith to do the job. Friend then says I want to share my New Year's resolutions with you:
1) Get rid of his ass (Incredulously I say That's not a resolution. She replies For me it is. He got ta go!)
2)Lose 25 lbs so I can find me a new man
3)Find a church home and establish a spiritual base
4)Be a better parent which I think will happen naturally once I get rid of his ass and start going to church
Ha! Friend is always good for more than a few laughs. I swear I wish I had recorded this conversation. This was one for the ages.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
11 comments:
That's sad to read. I prefer happy endings.
Marriage takes so much effort, of course, on the part of BOTH parties. One person can't carry the swing alone.
They've been together a long time. They know each other so well. Why don't they work anymore? When was the turning point? Maybe once they figure that out they could turn their relationship around for the better.
That's too bad they are going to break up. Maybe the new year can bring more happiness for them. As Shellyp said marriages are so hard and take much work. Hopefully they will think about their child's happiness as well as their own. Merry Christmas Shawn
Dang. Maybe she's serious this time. You think? My 2nd (ex) husband is from Merlin and that damn 'accent' drives me crazy. BTW I love the new picture.
shellyp - i like happy endings too but trust me when I tell you this is a match made in hell. they never shoulda married in the first place - neither were ready. to be honest, it's never worked. they've been together so long they don't know how to let go.
rose - happiness in the new year? maybe. whatever happens, it'll be entertaining.
chele - she's serious everytime - that's what makes the situation so funny. this is the game they play: they wage war; breakup; makeup; then start all over again. i have no doubt he'll leave but something tells me he'll be back in the picture very soon after his departure.
glad you liked the pic
I agree with Chele; I love the new pic.
Thanks for stopping by! I'm not usually emotional. As a matter of fact, on many occassions I've been accused of being cold-hearted. lol. Siblings know how to push your buttons.
Nice headshot! I love the twists.
shellyp - I have been labeled cold-hearted and emotionless by most people that I know. it's not uncommon for the term 'meanie' to be thrown in my direction. lol!
thanks for the compliment
berry - thanks! i am really thinking about locking my hair again.
I live in Maryland. Merlin is a connecting state that borders the The District. We Marylanders stay the hell away from Merlin.
Shawn,
I like that picture. Keep the locks, they look really nice on you.
Hope your friend has a good 2006.
Its a good look on you...nice to see those pearly whites too! Usually you are mugging in your pics.
bballmom - thank you for the compliment and posting again :-)
berry - muggin? grrrr!!! dems fightin words
Post a Comment