Friday, January 6

How Do YOU Know When God Is Leading You

Remember him? We'll call him spiritual. We make fun of each other like everyday about one thing or another. It doesn't matter if the topic is serious or not we find a way to make light of the situation. So for the last 2 weeks he and I have had a running joke about the sudden string of bad luck associated with him moving into his new apartment that I'd like to share.

We were on the phone talking about the madness that's been going with him and this fool says something to the effect of I know God is moving in my life when everything around me falls apart. The chaos is just God putting his stamp of approval on the blessing. I have never received a blessing from God without there being some kind of drama involved. I fall out laughing and say Oh, God is all up in this, huh? We both laugh then he says You're crazy! (His favorite expression to describe everyone) Why are you laughing? I am being serious. I say Ok Spiritual let's make a list.

Spiritual was scheduled to sign his new lease and get the keys to his apt on the 23rd of Dec. He didn't plan to physically move into the unit until the 26th of Dec.


  • The day before his new lease signing he is called into the leasing office where he is told he is not eligible to be considered a transferring tenant which would have entitled him to moving into a new unit without making a deposit. The leasing manager tells him the original leasing agent made a mistake when he told spiritual that he qualified as a transfer. The old lease was signed by spiritual and his roommate and since roommate was not going to be on the newer lease spiritual would be considered a new tenant and thus needed to make a $200 deposit along with a $35 application fee. The leasing manager and spiritual worked a deal that insured spiritual would get his $200 back - we'll revisit this.
  • A few weeks before his move (which he kept bugging me about getting on my nerves) he decides to put in his change of address at the local Post Office. Sarcastically, I tell him it's a bit early to be making address changes to which he responds even more sarcastically that the PO instructs you to make the change at least 3 weeks before you move to insure proper transition and delivery of mail to your new address. When Spiritual goes into the leasing office to sign his new lease on the 23rd as planned he is informed that the unit reserved for him has been rented to someone else. They tell him that the tenant had an emergency and they deemed it necessary to rent his reserved unit to her. When he asks for further explanation the leasing manager begins to accuse spiritual of not being eligible to reserve any units because he's late on his rent. He tells her he was 1 day late at the beginning of November and it's now late December and his rent is current. She still gives him much attitude and is very unapologetic about the inconvenience. In a moment of sober realization, he remembers that all of his personal bills: bank statements, credit card bills, telelphone are scheduled to arrive at the new apts address the same week as his move.
  • The leasing manager then tells him that that are no more studio apartments available. Spiritual is forced into renting a more expensive 1bd room. The manager offers him 1 mo free rent to make up for the apartment snafu. Later he finds out that the 1mo free rent is a standard holiday promotion for all new tenants and not a deal just for him
  • On the 26th, spiritual is moving his first load when he discovers that he's lost his key card and is forced to wait a little over an hour for the emergency maintenance crew to show up and give him a new access card for $10.
  • Spiritual calls Verizon, his local phone company, the morning of the 26th to give them a heads up on the address change. He placed his original phone transfer order using the address of the studio apt. The service rep informs him that phone service would not be able to be installed as scheduled that morning - a new order ticket needed to be created for the new address. He explains to the service rep that the new address was just another unit inside of the same complex as the old address he had given originally. She doesn't budge and schedules his next install appointment Jan 4th. To make matters worse, he had just changed his cell phone plan the previous week and had already run out of daytime minutes.
  • While packing and hauling things from the old apt to the new apt Spiritual gets an angry phone call from the cable guy inquiring into his whereabouts. Apparently, the cable guy had been waiting awhile for Spiritual at the new apt and he was furious. Spiritual tells the cable guy he's in the complex at his old apt and that he'll be there in a few minutes. The cable guy tells him he's not waiting and leaves. The following day the cable guy comes back out to install cable. Unbeknowest to spiritual, he installs the wrong cable box. Spiritual doesn't make the discovery until much later in the day when he settles in to watch tv and is forced to make a 3rd install appt.
  • A few days after the move is complete the leasing manager calls spiritual to inform him that the $200 tenant referral fee she promised his roommate would receive was not gonna happen. With spiritual's name being on the old lease with the roommate and on the new lease the situation didn't qualify as a referral. The $200 deposit spiritual thought he would get back through this referral fee was a bust.
  • The day before his move spiritual's bed breaks while he's masturbating. He doesn't know if it can be fixed
  • The 4th of Jan he takes a half day at work to be home for the Verizon install. The installer never steps foot into the apt. The phone line is turned on from the poles and/or Verizon's offices.
  • At 5am one day this week, Spiritual is awakened by the sounds of leaking water. He discovers water leaking from the ceiling in his bathroom.
  • Another day he was locked out of his apartment for 30 minutes. It seems maintenance entered his apartment while he wasn't there to fix something and when they left, they bolted his top lock. Spiritual doesn't have an operable key for the top lock. He's been asking management to provide a key or change the lock for over a week to no avail.

Every times he calls to add something new I jokingly say God, is all up in this, huh? and we fall out laughing.

So, how does God lead you? Do any of you have any horror stories like spiritual that let you know God was working things out in your favor?

9 comments:

chele said...

That was serious. You know I busted out laughing about the bed breaking ...

I remember when I first moved to VA with my 2nd husband:

We drove from CT. I drove the car and he followed me in the Uhaul. He hit the back of my car with the Uhaul before we even got on the highway good. We couldn't get the trunk closed and had to tie it down with rope.

We got lost on the way and an 8-hour trip took 14 hours.

It was a holiday weekend and even though I arrived in town on Saturday I couldn't get the keys to our apartment until Tuesday. We stayed with some trifling friends of his. Now I'm wondering why the hell I married this fool.

He was leaving to go out to sea on Monday. So, I was left with a 3-year old, and a Uhaul with all my belongings in a new city and no help.

Luckily, an old friend of mine was also stationed in VA and I was able to reach him and he put my son and I up in a hotel for the night and he moved us into the apartment on Tuesday. The apartment that hubby found was on the second floor, no AC and in the heart of the ghetto. When he came back from sea I made him break the lease and get me the hell out of the there.

Eventually, everything worked in my favor BUT I believe that all that confusion was meant to tell me that I should have stayed my happy ass right in CT.

Tasha Who? said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Tasha Who? said...

Damn... a man can't even get a break while trying to relieve stress and satisfy himself!!!

Seriously, that would have made me up and find another place to stay... I've already had my fair share of disonesty and snotty wenches in apartment complexes, and someone would have caught hell... but I guess he had no choice but to roll with those punches...

I hope he doesn't take a drink and set himself on fire...*smh*

As far as God leading me... I take more of a Buddhist approach to life, but I do many times think that there is a higher being that likes to put a spin on my life from time to time just to see how I'll handle it... makes me wonder if I've succeeded or failed his tests...

SuzLue said...

Well, your friend should get to a church and light a candle or something. This was funny.

This actually happened to my Grams, but she and a friend were going to a funeral, and ended up following a different procession to the cemetary. When they realized they were crying at the grave site of a stranger they started giggling and snuck away. God really does have a sick sense of humor.

Stacy-Deanne said...

I stay away from religious topics because of my personal beliefs but this was a great post, Shawn. If you don't mind, vote for my sites please. Go to my latest blog post to see how. I would appreciate it. Thanks! Stay cool in the 06'!

Shawn said...

chele - man that was choatic

tasha - he's trying to raise hell. he's written 3 or 4 letters

suezette - hahaha! that takes the cake

kathi said...

Yup, I've got one...I think.
When I first became a Christian and God told me to move to Texas, I didn't wanna go! Hate HOT weather, so took a vacation and visited, but decided I wasn't 'hearing' Him right, cause it was just nasty hot. Finally ( a long story, another time, k?) when I knew it was His will, I said, okay, I'll move after I sell everything. Couldn't sell even my finest antiques, ended up giving it all away. Then, my car makes a ticking sound two days before moving, they tell me the engine is fixin to blow a rod. I prayed over it, drove it all the way to Dallas. Got here, and my apt. was 2 days away from being ready and no electricity for 3 days. Opened the fridge, just to look around first five minutes there...covered in these big black bugs...first time I'd ever seen a roach. Went to the store (it was a Sunday) and they had the blue law then when they wouldn't sell anything but food on Sundays. So, had to sleep in a roach infested apartment with no electricity that night. Did I mention when I got to Dallas, I had $13. That's all. I'd light candles and see roaches run from the animal bowls! But, found a job bartending 2nd day there, and since I was very experienced, didn't have to train, made great money, fumed the apt., met my hubby in a few months...you know the rest. All good. But, for a while, I seriously thought that either I had a huge hearing problem when it came to hearing from God, or that he just had a wicked sense of humor.

kathi said...

Oh, and the car that 2 mechanics said I needed a new engine for? Ran perfect for over a year and I ended up giving it away to a guy who needed a car. I've never had to buy a car since then, every car I have has been given to me (us). See, you reap what ya sow.

Shawn said...

kathi - something told me you'd have a story to share. That was quite an experience. Candles and roaches? Whoa!!!!